The Long Distance Equestrian

So it has been an eventful month, so far. I moved with my family into a new, smaller house, which is nice. I have to share a room with my brother, and so far, it hasn't been bad. We get to bond a bit, and surprisingly, we do not get on each other's nerves. It took us about almost two weeks to get everything moved it. Now that everything is pretty much settled, the new house is starting to feel cozy, and it has been a bit more peaceful. I did my first horse show on November 7th, and ended up placing rather well in the classes that I entered. I got second place in both my English Under Saddle Class, and my Hunter class, got fifth place in my trail class, then won my Bareback Ride-A-Buck class. It was a nice, although very chilly day to be showing. I was nervous throughout the day, but glad that I went out and did well in my classes. I rode Noony for show day. He was being shared by me and four other riders, so he had quite the work out, and was pretty much done by the time it g...

So yeah, I have been keeping up with my riding lessons. I have to say, I am so glad to be back in the saddle. I feel as happy as ever when I am in the barn, with the horses, and helping out when I can. The lessons have been going pretty well. I rode yesterday in the morning, and have been riding Noony the most, although I did have my first fall in six years yesterday. I was learning how to canter on the lunge line. In the beginning, the lesson was going ok, though for some reason, whenever asking to canter, I never seem to lean back, as I would like to. I always tend to lean a bit forward, and could feel myself tensing up before asking him to canter. When I ask, he does canter for about one beat or two beats, but then goes into a fast trot. Now, the reason for that is that I tend to fall back right away when asking, so in a way, it does not send a clear message to Noony that I want to canter. Now that, with in combination of a forward, tense position does not bode well when getting a h...

My first riding lesson last Saturday was a success. According to my riding instructor, I have the basic cores of riding pretty much down. This Saturday, she will be a bit more intense with my lesson, meaning that there will be more intense exercises for me to work on with my lesson horse. I am both excited, yet a little nervous about how this Saturday lesson will go. I wonder if I will have to ride without my stirrups... which probably will eventually happen, since I have done that kind of thing before, when I used to take lessons. It will be hell on my legs, but worth it, in the long run. Horse riding is worth aching legs, and other parts of the body. My lesson horse partner so far, is Gunnar. Gunnar is an Appaloosa gelding with a kind, but lazy demeanor. He is the type of horse, where a riding will always have to keep a leg on him. I do like that he is easy going, and like how he responds to my leg, and movements in the saddle. He seems to respond well, and without any protest. Sur...

After six years of being out of the saddle, it is finally time to get back in the game again. I gathered up the courage to message a stable on Monday, that offered riding lessons. I have been following them on Facebook for quite a bit now, and finally felt it was time to try to get back into riding lessons once again. The good news is that I got a message from them on Tuesday morning, with all the info that I needed. Now, I am scheduled to visit the barn at 10:30am on Saturday. The visit will most likely consist of observing the grounds, and talking one on one with the instructor about what I wish to achieve with horse riding. It has been like it has been so long since I have actively been riding. I feel like I have to start from scratch, and relearn everything. I am both excited, and nervous about the barn visit. I am hoping that I will mesh well with the instructor, and that the barn will feel like the right barn for me. I miss the Barn environment, and what it entails. I miss being ...

It is no good to be stressed all the time, and I know that. It is just hard not to be stressed most of the time. My main sources of the stress are home life, and a bit of the work life. It can be stressful at work, at least when it is a busy day, and nothing is done. If nothing is done before close, I usually have to try to rush myself in order to get the closing done in a timely manner. This can be difficult on a busy day, when there is a line out the door. Sometimes, when it is busy, there will be a short slow down time of maybe ten minutes, to thirty minutes. Doing those break bursts, I quickly try to stock what has to be stocked, and try to pre close what I can. I love it more when it is a steady day... not too fast, and not too slow. When it is steady, I can get things done in a timely manner, and I still have other things to do by the time the primary pre closing is done. It also helps to have a person who is willing to help the closer with pre closing duties. Usually, there will...

Well, on Wednesday I went to the Social Security office to finally change my last name. I now feel like I am really his wife, and it feels great! Of course, we have been married for three years, and I felt like his wife then, but now, it feels more official in a way? Anyway, the card with my new last name should be arriving in two weeks. Then, I get to do the fun stuff, like notifying my work, bank, oh, and getting a new passport with the new last name. I think I am going to save the passport for last, since this year, I am in no rush to change it right away. Nope, there is not going to be any traveling to England from me, this year. Hopefully next year, when I travel to England, it will be for good. Work has been a bit more easy going for me, although I do wish that we closed at nine, instead of ten every day. I mean, sure, there is more time to prepare for closing, but I just do not like getting out at 11:00pm every night. It makes going to bed at a decent hour pretty difficult. I ...

I think I am starting to get back into my old routine. I work four to five days a week, come home, and either get on the pc to relax from the work day, or take a shower first before going to bed. If I have a day off, I will usually skype with the hubby and spend some time with him. I also talk to him a bit before work, but he is usually busy playing a game, or doing something else over there, which is fine. I will also try to do my chores around the house, and get my work laundry done so I have fresh clothes for the next work day. Getting into a routine has caused me to think a little less about the distance. It helps to focus on other things, and it does makes the days go by a little faster. However, at night seems to be the worst time. There are no distractions for me, so many stressful thoughts and worries come flooding to me during that time. It is also difficult for me to sleep at night. It is either too hot, or too cold, and I always find myself tossing a lot. Maybe I need to p...

Night is the loneliest time during the day. At night, a person is left alone with just thoughts, and feelings. The best way to cope with these thoughts and feelings is to write them all down, then let it out. This is why I love writing in my blog. It allows me to freely express myself, and to let my emotions pour into my writing. I start missing him at night because that is when I think about how we would lay in bed, either watching tv, cuddling, or just sleeping together. I liked how I made myself comfortable. I would always put my leg over his, and I would always try to curl up close to him in the beginning of the night. When I woke up the next day, my leg would still kind of be over him, but I would find myself further away from him, most likely because it gets really hot in the room at night. His cat would always sleep with us too. She would either sleep in the middle of us, or on top of one of the many pillows on the bed. I miss cuddling with his cat. I loved his cat, and woul...

It is Easter weekend, and I work tomorrow, and Sunday. I have a feeling that it is going to be busy at my job tomorrow. On Sunday, however, it will probably be slow. It is always slow on Easter. I am hoping that the store will close earlier than 10pm on Easter, but I doubt it. Oh, one can only dream. So, now it has been a full week since I came back from England. I still find it kind of hard to cope with the distance after coming back. I was so used to the routine that my husband and I had over in England. We would get up, have breakfast if either of us was hungry, then talk about what to do for the day. The day would either consist of shopping for bits and pieces, tidying the house a bit, or just relaxing. I loved our routine, and loved how we planned together. Now, rather than ask what "we" have planned for the day, I ask him what he has planned for the day. It is a bit harder to talk to one another, since he is five hours ahead of me. By the time I come from work, he is ...

It has been almost a week, since I came home from my visitation with my husband. So far, I am just going through the motions with waking up, work, and then coming home to prepare for bed. Work has actually been easy, and stress free for me, so far. Last night was my first time closing in four months, and I pretty much got into the swing of things. I just have to get my old routine back in order, because I did finish a bit later, than what I would have liked to finish. At least I also close on both Monday, and Tuesday. I think I should be good by at least Tuesday. It seems as though a lot of my coworkers missed me. There are also some new faces at the cafe, and quite a few changes. The old General Manager got fired, and one of the Assistant Managers within the cafe got promoted to General Manager. I am really happy that she got promoted; she deserves the promotion. After all, she has been working there for quite a while, and knows the ins and outs of working at the cafe. She also brin...

Tomorrow, I start work again, which should be a relief for me. It is at least something to keep me busy, while my husband and I have to wait until December to see each other again. At least work will make the time pass by fast... hopefully. Plus, there is a lot of things I have to do. For instance, I have to change my last name, so I take my husband's name. When that is done, of course, I have to change my passport so that it matches my surname That means, that I will not be able to travel, until I get another passport that matches my surname. At least these two things are something that I have to work on in the coming months. As long as I focus my attention on the things that have to be done, I should be fine... I think. I just hope that I will not stress myself out with these things. I also hope that my mother does not stress me out. Before the visit, she was stressing me out really bad. All she would do was criticize, gripe, and bombard me with questions about when exactly the...

Well, I am home now... back in the States, and so far, I feel so alone. It is weird waking up, and not being able to see my husband's face first thing in the morning. It makes me feel a bit depressed that I will not be able to see him in person until December. My heart feels like it is breaking, and I cannot help but cry when I am alone. I should be used to these visits by now, and having to spend time apart from him, but the truth is that it is never easy. It just gets harder for me to spend time apart from him. I wish there was an easier way to break the distance. International long distance relationships are probably the most difficult to close the distance... there is a lot of paperwork, money, and patience involved when trying to close an International relationship. Patience is all we really have at the moment. I really hope that December comes quickly. I want these months to fly by fast, just so that I can see his face and hug him again. It was heartbreaking, having to leav...

Tomorrow is when I go back to the States. Tomorrow is when I will be, unfortunately leaving my husband alone. Tomorrow is the day that the distance, will once again, be an obstacle to overcome. I envy that my husband could fall asleep so easily, and be quiet, and peaceful. I wish that I could fall asleep... No, I have been awake now for about twenty five minutes. My mind is all over the place, thinking of the things that we shared, and things I wish I had said to him.  I do not want to worry him. I want to be strong, and put up a brave face for him. I do not want to be in a massive pool of tears tomorrow. I dread how I might react, once we get to the airport. I am afraid that I will lose my composure in front of him, and that it will be difficult of me to let go of his hand, to leave for the gate.  It is true that eventually, all things must come to an end. Why must the end be so hard? Why cannot things be simple for international couples that are in a Long Distance Relationsh...

Yup, I have three more days remaining until I have to go back to the States. As the day gets closer, I cannot help but dread when it is time. I have no idea how I will feel, come Tuesday. Will I cry like a baby again? Will I be content and well? Will I just be a mess of emotions? Sometimes, when thinking about the day, my heart beats fast, and I start to get nervous.  I worry about my husband. I worry how he will feel when I go back. It will just be him and his cat, alone in the house that he lives. I feel for him, and wish that it did not have to be this way, but there is nothing neither of us could do. I hope we will get back into a good routine of skyping when we can, and trying to find ways to spend time together while apart. I hope that my job distracts me from me being emotional, when I go back.

So yeah, happy 2015. It has been a while since I updated the blog... but that's because I have been spending a lot of time with my husband in person.  As you all know, he came to visit me in the States from September to November. Well, I went back to England with him, and spent November to March here. I was originally suppose to leave on the 20th of January, but both he and I wanted to extend the ticket until March 24th. I am thankful that my boss at my job allowed me to do so, and thankful that I am spending this much time with him. We did a lot of things, while we were together in both the States and England. In the States, we went to my Uncle's wedding, and got to celebrate Halloween and my birthday. In England, we celebrated Christmas and New Year's together, got a chance to hang with my in laws, went to Amsterdam, and got a chance to enjoy Valentine's Day and our Anniversary together. Amsterdam was enjoyable. We went there for three days, and explored the city, and...